Trendy, Indulgent, and Cruel

Holee Crap! I’m frickin’ trendy! From yesterday’s NY Times (Chasing Utopia, Family Imagines No Possessions):

AUSTIN, Tex. — Like many other young couples, Aimee and Jeff Harris spent the first years of their marriage eagerly accumulating stuff: cars, furniture, clothes, appliances and, after a son and a daughter came along, toys, toys, toys.

Now they are trying to get rid of it all, down to their fancy wedding bands. Chasing a utopian vision of a self-sustaining life on the land as partisans of a movement some call voluntary simplicity, they are donating virtually all their possessions to charity and hitting the road at the end of May.

[…]

They are not alone.

Matt and Sara Janssen, who traded down from their house in Iowa to a studio apartment in Montana and finally an R.V. powered by vegetable oil, now crisscross the country with their 4-year-old daughter, highway nomads living on $1,500 a month.

Not that simplicity need be that spartan. Cindy Wallach and her husband, Doug Vibbert, of Annapolis, Md., moved out of their apartment with an “everything must go” party and, along with their 3-year-old son, now sail and make their home on a 44-by-24-foot catamaran.

“We never wanted four walls and beige carpet,” Ms. Wallach said.

Though it may not be the stuff of the typical American dream, the voluntary simplicity movement, which traces its inception to 1980s Seattle, is drawing a great deal of renewed interest, some experts say.

Well, well. My story is sorta like the Janssen’s… I went from house to apartment to RV in about a year, giving up about 93% of my possessions in the process… and that was painful. Don’t let anyone tell you it isn’t, Gentle Reader. I don’t go on about it all that much (do I?) with the possible exception of bemoaning the loss of my music LP collection, which I do quite frequently. That said, I wouldn’t go back to my previous life. Because possessions are insidious: they DO tie you down. Dealing with a lot of “stuff” takes a lot of effort, time, and money, as does the acquisition of same. So I agree with this “voluntary simplicity” thing.

There is one key difference, however, between the Janssens and me. I cannot imagine, for the life of me, how a family of three can live on only $1,500 per month in these United States, especially if they live in an RV and do any traveling at all. I don’t care if the thing IS fueled with vegetable oil… RVs get lousy mileage, no matter what fuel they use. Maybe they get their vegetable oil for free, I dunno. But even if they DO get free used oil out of Micky Dee’s deep fat fryers, $1,500 per month is still a very small sum for a family of three. My income is significantly more than theirs, even after taking child support and alimony into consideration, which knocks a pretty sizable chunk right off the top. And I don’t live what I would call an extravagant life…hand-rolled cigars and microbrews aside. (Those two things are my only indulgences, by the way, if you ignore Miss Zukiko.) I don’t think I could live on that amount of money, even if my obligations weren’t considered. I wish the article had elaborated on that aspect of “voluntary simplicity.” That sounds more like voluntary poverty to me.

But. I have very mixed emotions after reading this article. It’s one thing to be trendy while flying under the radar (and unbeknownst to myself, too). It’s quite another kettle of fish to be recognized as such by the frickin’ New York Times. My Gawd.

(Image from PingMag.com)

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Speaking of cigars and indulgences… I receive “special offer” e-mails from cigar.com from time to time. Here’s one such offer, received this morning:

Arturo Fuente God of Fire 15th Anniversary Humidor Sampler
This sampler features a handcrafted Special Edition humidor that holds 300 cigars! Only 30 have ever been made, each including an optima hygrometer, humidifier, lift-out tray and cedar dividers. This deluxe package has 80 never commercially released God of Fire Torpedos from 2004. Want more? For $12,499.95, you will receive 400 cigars, 100 each of the following: Pyramid, Robusto, Double Robusto and Churchill.
As Seen In Robb Report Magazine!

Price: $6.499.95

Ummm… I don’t think so. There’s not even a Certificate of Authenticity included. And the teevee has repeatedly emphasized to all us Discerning Connoisseurs of Fine Stuff that we need certificates. All the best “as seen on teevee” deals have ‘em.

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I go in for my surgery tomorrow morning at 0800 hrs, and I’ll admit to being just a little bit apprehensive. But not about the procedure itself…I’m OK with that. Nope, what has me worried is (a) how am I gonna get enough sleep, given as how I’m normally up to all hours of the night and early morning? and (b) I have to fast before the procedure. Item (b) means NO coffee tomorrow morning. So: I have to get up at the crack o' dawn (so to speak) and I can't have coffee?

I think that’s cruel and inhuman.