They're Not Underage...

...we're just counting wrong. Doubtless you’ve heard there’s a lil bit of controversy surrounding the ages of the Chinese women gymnasts… Well, Scott Ott found the answer:

China: Gymnasts Ages Based on Chinese Calendar
by Scott Ott

(2008-08-15) — Authorities in Beijing today put to rest U.S. claims that girls on the Chinese gymnastics squad were not yet 16 years-old, the minimum age for Olympic competition, by noting that this is the year 4705 in China, not 2008.

“Our girls are actually older than their U.S. opponents based on our government’s more accurate and efficient method of tracking the passage of time,” said an unnamed spokesman for Communist regime. “We have already had more than twice as many years as the Western world, and so our gymnasts are double the 12 or 13 years they appear to be. By the way, most of our girls have put off marriage in order to compete in these Olympic games.”

That’s just a taste, Gentle Reader. You know there’s more. And you should go read it. If ya need a laugh, or even if ya don't.